Sitting at my desk at work and all of a sudden I just started bawling my eyes out. Total overwhelming feeling of emptiness and there is something wrong. I don't know what just happened or if this marvelous little empathic kick to the teeth was even about you guys (I do have offline people I care about after all), but...
Fuck.
Please let me be wrong. Let it just be PMS. Or I'm losing my mind. Please.
Kay, don't you DARE go off the deep end. What would Lucien think? He needs you. Maybe this feeling is nothing of issue, and you are worrying over nothing. Even if it's real, you need to be stronger then this.
ReplyDeleteDon't give in to despair.
You can do this, I know you can.
I think I'd rather be off the deep end right now. Last time I started crying for no reason out of no where like this, I found out the next morning that I started crying at the same time a friend's brother shot himself in the head.
ReplyDeleteThat's no excuse.
ReplyDeleteYou have managed to be brave enough to try experimenting on this thing so far, haven't you? You should be able to deal with whatever's to come.
And if you aren't you have friend's that are there for you, and will do whatever they can to comfort you. I'm sure you do. And you also have your brother. I really don't think he'd want you to lose your mind.
Please, think about your brother. Think about how much this will effect him.
*sigh*
ReplyDeleteYou obviously meant to be supportive, but accusing me of losing my mind because I fell apart for a bit is extremely insulting. I've had three of these fall apart for no reason moments in my life. The first one, my boyfriend was killed by a drunk driver. The second one I mentioned above. The third is now.
And if by some chance it does mean nothing, its just everything that has happened to me in the past month catching up with me, you have zero right to tell me that I can't fall apart.
I'm sorry, I don't mean to offend you. It's just that my friend is in a tough time at a moment, and I'm beginning to fear for her. And now reading these things happening to all of these different people. Just seeing everything fall apart with almost no hope for the future.
ReplyDeleteI don't want anybody to suffer.
All I want to do right now is help, but I suppose you are right, and I'm not helping much.
I apologize. Please forgive me and...please be safe. I guess.
I hope you're okay Kay. Sorry I'm just commenting now.
ReplyDeleteYeah I'm calmer now. I'll post in a little bit.
ReplyDeletetry obsidian again.
ReplyDeleteI haven't stopped trying it. But I appreciate the concern.
ReplyDelete